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Global Warming Thwarted By Thinner Coats »

Posted by: ind06 1 year, 4 months ago

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EARTH - It appears that despite all the worry and debate, global warming has once and for all been defeated by the use of thinner jackets. Millions have feared the coming planet-wide disasters that global warming could set in motion, but now it seems the issue is moot thanks to the discovery of thinner coats by Dr. Tanner Lewis of St. Louis, MO.

Read Full Story at bigfib.com

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Comments So Far: 31

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ind061 year, 4 months ago

A new provision is being hastily written into the Homeland Security Act making it treasonous to wear a heavy coat. The fur lobby is expected to fight the amendment.
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kctrixter1 year, 4 months ago

In a related story, Europe returns to drinking warm beer.
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kobzikov1 year, 4 months ago

Finally, the scientists have gotten their act together and solved the global warming problem instead of just bitching and whining about it.
Now if they could just figure out what to do about the global cooling that's gonna happen in 3 years.
Hmmm, maybe they should consider using thicker jackets to combat global cooling?
Wow. I think I just had a brain-fart. And I'll be securing the patent rights to it first thing in the morning, so don't even think about trying to take credit for it.
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  ind061 year, 4 months ago
  
  Too late, see TAGS above :)
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    elll1 year, 4 months ago
    
    lmao...you think of everything
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    kobzikov1 year, 4 months ago
    
    Grrrr...
    I will get you next time lucky ducky!!!
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  protoham1 year, 4 months ago
  
  Forget it, Al Gore already has the patent rights on Global Cooling. That is for the 2012 presidential race.
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tehranchik1 year, 4 months ago

This is a very well thought out article--polished off by our own ind06! :)))))
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  tehranchik1 year, 4 months ago
  
  I forgot to ask---I'm wearing flip flops, do they help?
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    ind061 year, 4 months ago
    
    Sections of our government have been said to be pro flip flop.
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airglide1 year, 4 months ago

Using this concept you could win the "war" on poverty. Find someone who admits to being poor. Kill them. Publicize it. No one else will admit to being poor. Poverty is over.
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BronxBomber1 year, 4 months ago

I wonder if my boston ferns will thrive if indeed there is a global warming...my poor little babies.....
:'(
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  kctrixter1 year, 4 months ago
  
  I'm sure your ferns will be fine, although you may have to switch from the Boston fern to the Arctic fern
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johnkamis641 year, 4 months ago

Worry not for ferns; as they are smarter than the average Bush...

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  ciera-marie1 year, 4 months ago
  
  LOL johnkamis64: good one!
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tehranchik1 year, 4 months ago

Maybe we could make a documentary about you.
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ind061 year, 4 months ago

I have answers:
1. Yes, if your coat is then examined and certified by a government "coat thinning" agent.
2. All removed stuffing must be handed over to said government coat thinning agent for weighing and is non-returnable.
3. Al Gore invented thin coats. Haven't you ever heard of "Gore-tex"?
Welk, Welk clkbeus99 :)
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MajJohn1 year, 4 months ago

The comments were funnier than the story.
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kctrixter1 year, 4 months ago

tile-x is just a shill for the tidy-bole man, he couldn't be here himself cus in down with respiratory problems.
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ind061 year, 4 months ago

What else would a bathroom cleanser do but "sink"?
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  johnkamis641 year, 4 months ago
  
  Failed bathroom cleansers frequently go down the drain...
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protoham1 year, 4 months ago

Balmy Breezes, girls walking around in Bikinis, I fail to see the problem!!
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kctrixter1 year, 4 months ago

Anchorage, home of spring break, January 2015
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droid39131 year, 4 months ago

Maybe we'll have more nude beaches? Oh yea.. that darn sun and no ozone. Human lobsters! lol
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hellobigworld1 year, 4 months ago

I will vote for the beaches without bikinis. Lets have another sixties but this time about global warming.
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  johnkamis641 year, 4 months ago
  
  America will Rise up and Salute nude beaches!!!
  (well, SOMETHING will rise up and salute!!!)
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holyshiite1 year, 4 months ago

I read where the UN said that more carbon dioxide is produced from cows farting than from Autos. It seems to me if we would start putting beano in cattle feed the problem would be solved and the world would be saved.
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dragon51261 year, 4 months ago

COWS FARTING???? SOMEBODY SHOOT ROSIE O'DONNELL!!!!
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  ind061 year, 4 months ago
  
  oh dear.
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  johnkamis641 year, 4 months ago
  
  I'm not in the MMMOOOOOOOOODD!!!
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elel1 year, 4 months ago

I think the Northeast retailers are on this already, you can no longer buy a thick coat in January, by Febuary the bathing suits are out, and forget about salt for the driveway, not gonna be able to get that till next year :)
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